SNL: The Californians

Posted by on Sunday, April 15, 2012 · 53 Comments 

From last night’s SNL, a look at the soap opera “The Californians”. As a native Californian, I can tell you, all of this is accurate. Fully.



Bonus! Click here to see the Dress Rehearsal of The Californians



  • Conesej

    what is the name of the song used for the theme called?

    • Beautylosangeles

      Ventura Highway by America

    • Cuvee31

      The theme is from a 1940′s song called “Yes My Darling Daughter”. I’ve been waiting for 70 years for someone to ask that question!

    • Deb1250

      ventura highway, America

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ibrahim-Siddiqui/1346191837 Ibrahim Siddiqui

    Too funny! LOL I live in Orange County and this is so damn hilarious lol

  • http://www.facebook.com/mcelroys5th Derrick McElroy

    This is So. Cal

  • ATaft

    First of all, you can’t take San Vincente to the 10. Second of all, there’s no Culver exit off the 105, that’s the 90. Worst skit ever. 

    • Daavid

      Lol. 

    • yamutha

      You’re an idiot. This skit is hilarious, you obviously have the personality of a foot. 

      • ML

        This is literally the best comment I’ve ever read on the internet.

      • Tamaterbmd

        I think he was trying to be funny….

      • Tamaterbmd

        I think he was trying to be funny….

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Robert-Paulson/100001975480820 Robert Paulson

        You’re an idiot, and have the capability for getting jokes of a sandwich.

      • Chris

        Yup Yamutha, you win the internet. Hilarious comment

      • Chris

        Yup Yamutha, you win the internet. Hilarious comment

    • Bob

      so, yall really do talk like that

    • http://twitter.com/RichieReza Richie Reza

      You, sir, are a daft idiot.

    • Ddmeier05

      How would you expect out of state actors to know that?

    • Guest

      Love it. Although some people clearly aren’t understanding your sense humor, ATaft. Maybe they’re daft idiots with feet personalities (whatever that is).

    • Guest

      Duuuuuude, clearly you are an exact example of the people they are making fun of– you obviously don’t get it or else you wouldn’t have responded like a Thomas Guide.  Props on your navigation skills, though.  San Vicente is a great alternative to taking the 10, but you’re right it does not connect.

    • http://profiles.yahoo.com/u/6LJFVZQ7RDU5JKOAD3NL5AIXF4 PETER

      Haw, you realize you’re just proving how accurate this thing is, right?

    • LAGuest

      I get your comment.  You are making fun of comic book man from The Simpsons.  LOL.

    • Jennyross7

      Technically if you take the 105 to the end it dumps you off onto Vista Del Mar which turns into Culver. There is no exit for the 90 off of the 105. You have to take the 405 to get to the 90. So you are the one who is clueless to LA freeways.

      • cambia

        i think left foot personality.

  • SylverWyrd

    Excuuuuuuse me! That is SOUTHERN california, it’s like a different state altogether! Everybody knows in the North Bay Area you can get around on the Bart, or Cal Trans, or buses. Who needs a car dude, we use our bikes!

    • Cibreca

      I totally added the Californian accent to your reply dude. You’re totally a Californian,,, you just don’t know it yet!

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Robert-Paulson/100001975480820 Robert Paulson

      …Yeah, not sure exactly what’s going on in this comment.  You start by mentioning the North Bay, then you mention public transportation, which residents of the North Bay are too good for, and would fight with their lives….  Then you talk about bikes, which puts the area solidly in either in SF or Davis.

      If you want to do a Norcal snob fusion for your own parady, you’ve got to combine the elements just right, you understand.  You don’t necessarily mention any specific place, but the universe starts at Monterey and ends around Fairfield in the North and Livermore in the East, you wear skinny-jeans, and have a twitter account which you find to actually be relevant.  You had a blog at some point in the last five years but would not admit to it today.  You have at least 4 different bags which you use for different categories of trash and recycling, though they are set up such that nobody can tell on their own what is supposed to be what, and you would be grievously offended if someone mixed them up.  You are just a douche-y about your produce as residents of SoCal, but don’t care.  The transportation culture is very different, anyone that wants to get somewhere can figure it out for themselves, but, when you do talk about freeways, anyone who prefaces one with the article, “the” (i.e. “the five”) will get stares like they come from another planet.  Anyone who refers to San Francisco as “Frisco” will be taken under consideration for violent retribution.  Lastly, the sin of mistaking you for a Southern Californian will irk you greatly.

  • Wlorton

    That is hilarious.  I think it’s totally inspired by this Monty Python skit…   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTVDOx35FNg

    • Ionstorm

      Thanks for that python post, Wlorton! Amazing– I’m sure SNLs Californians was inspired by that as well. Both are hilarious.

  • ThatKidd

    HAHAHHAHAH– ahhh-WhAt R uDoInG here

  • mt

    Funny and true!  In LA, so much thought goes into what route to take & parking validation (!)   Go to Mulholland Dr– into the “valley”.  

  • http://twitter.com/RichieReza Richie Reza

    HOly shitttt!  ”What are you doin home so earlaaaaaaa?”  LMAO!!  Dude I love Muhlholland Dr.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Lucy-Krakow/742000627 Lucy Krakow

    Let it be known that is does not even almost relate to anyone above Pismo Beach.

  • Tim_neri

    I love this skit! As an ex-angelean, it’s too funny! Now… We just hop into the subway. No problem on the freeways!

  • Tim_neri

    I love this skit! As an ex-angelean, it’s too funny! Now… We just hop into the subway. No problem on the freeways!

  • Tim_neri

    I love this skit! As an ex-angelean, it’s too funny! Now… We just hop into the subway. No problem on the freeways!

  • Annakayblack

    My mom bought a house where they build the 405 and had it moved to Reseda, Calif. However, now it is torn down and a new house is built there.   I always hated the Santa Monica Freeway coming into the Valley.  Everyone drives so fast. Last time I was down that way with a friend going to the Honda center we got lost, missed the turn off,  I told her to turn she did not, but she did not.
    I love the L.A. traffic when it is slow.   No fear.

  • Devon?WatRUdoinhere?!

    Hilarious!! I don’t care if they are inaccurate!! This is so freakin funny!! And the fact that Josh Brolin’s character sounds just like a nieghbor of mine, makes it even funnier!! :D :D

  • LAGuest

    LOL, hilarious b/c this is how we actually converse in L.A.–not with the accent.  But, we always talk about how we “got here”, where we live and which way we take to so-and-so.  LOL at the tangerines and avocados.  All they needed was to throw in Trader Joe’s.  We’re also obsessed with that store and talk about what we bought there.  On a side note, I would say that the racial makeup of this video is Orange County and the convo. is L.A.

  • Sfafa

    waaa ryou duin here

  • Sfafa

    waaa ryou duin here

  • beachndude

    I was going to comment earlier but I got tied up in traffic coming from Laural Cyn onto the 101 North to the 405south and then got off early at Wilshire because it always backs up before the 10, after that I took Bundy down to where it turns in to Centinela all the way to Venice Blvd to the Beach.  I had my phone on charge the whole way so I could text my comment before I caught some waves, then enjoyed as nice glass of Napa Valley Chardonnay and a fresh basil caprese made with organic mozzarella from the farmer’s market..  sweet..

    • cambia

      you forgot to tell us how you looked.

  • Rick

    Love the Californians. Hate it when they break out of character 30 seconds into the skit.

  • Rick

    Love the Californians. Hate it when they break out of character 30 seconds into the skit.

  • http://www.facebook.com/DAGOINBELOIT Jim Meyer

    PLEASE help me. What is the tune that it used for the theme music for the SNL show ‘the CALIFORNIANS?’ I know it’s an oldy, but I can’t find the damned song. All I can remember is that delightful guitar music.

  • http://www.facebook.com/DAGOINBELOIT Jim Meyer

    PLEASE help me. What is the tune that it used for the theme music for the SNL show ‘the CALIFORNIANS?’ I know it’s an oldy, but I can’t find the damned song. All I can remember is that delightful guitar music.

    • jeaux

      I am pretty sure it’s the intro to “ventura highway” by America.

  • unknown

    Here’s the script for those who need it.

    The Californians

    Actors:
    Karina (wife who’s cheating)
    Devin (worker)
    Stewart (husband)
    Greg (Doctor)
    Trey (random guy)
    Aubrey (friend)
    (All with super exaggerated
    Californian accents)
    Maid (Spanish accent)

    Script:
    Theme music: Ventura Road by
    America

    Voice: The
    Californians

    Karina: (On chair
    drinking wine) I’m glad you came over Devin.

    Devin: (Walking over
    with wine glass) I am too.

    Karina: (Stands up)
    Maybe you should get going before Stewart gets home.

    Devin: You’re probably
    right. I was gonna take Canyon View drive over to San Vicente, and then make a
    left and get on the 405 north, from there, just get off on Mulholland.

    Karina: I totally like
    that (Kisses Devin)

    Stewart: (walks in
    with hands full of tangerines) hey honey, I brought us some tangerines. This
    guy was selling them on the off ramp over by the 2. (Lowers hands and looks at
    Devin) Devin?

    Devin: (Makes
    surprised/ scared look)

    Karina: (Makes shocked
    look and looks over at Devin)

    Stewart: ewwwwhat are
    you doing here?

    Karina: Stewart. Why
    are you home so early?

    Stewart: I skipped
    Wilshire and took Beverly over to Santa Monica and took that all the way up.

    Devin: uh hey Stewart.
    Yeah, I just came over to f-fix the speakers, the outside speakers on the
    patio. I think they sound pretty good. How was work?

    Stewart: I think you
    should go home now, Devin.

    Karina: (Yelling)
    There’s nothing going on Stewart!

    Stewart: I said go
    home! Get back on San Vicente, take it to the 10, then switch over to the 405
    north and let it dump you out onto Mulholland where you belong!

    Karina: Stewart! At
    this time of day? It’s going to be jammed, are you crazy?

    Stewart: Just get on
    the 10 and get outta here!

    (All move over to mirror and
    start fixing their hair, trying to get into the mirrors view, look surprised,
    etc.)

    Intermission sort of thing

    Theme music: Ventura Road by
    America

    Voice: The
    Californians

    Karina: Thanks for
    helping me put away these sun dried tomatoes in this clay bowl

    Stewart: Great. Imma
    go get in the Jacuzzi.

    Maid: Mister Stewart a
    doctor is here to see you!

    Stewart: Doctor?
    (Walks over to doctor at door) Greg, what are you doing here? You don’t make house calls.

    Greg: oh well, I was
    in the area and thought I’d drop by to talk to you about your test results. I
    tried to go through on Westwood, but my GPS put me on Beverly-Glen and I didn’t
    want to end up in Enceno. Anyway, I think you should sit down, Stewart.

    Stewart: All right.
    Let’s sit down on these Mexican Country style chairs

    Greg: Yeah, totally.
    (Both move over to chairs and sit)

    Stewart: (Hands Greg a
    glass of wine)

    Greg: oh thanks. So,
    umm, uh. Oh! (remembers) uh You have cancer dude.

    Stewart: (surprised
    face) Are you serious?

    Greg: Yeah man, but
    don’t even worry, cuz there’s a good treatment center in Marina Del Ray.
    There’s lots of street parking and if not, there’s like a Coffee Bean across
    the street that fully validates. I live right by there, that’s how I know.

    Stewart: All the way
    on the other side of the 10?! That’s almost long beach, man

    Karina: Stewart, look
    at me. You can do this. I know a shortcut through El Segundo. Take the 105 West
    and exit on Culver. When you say the Zankou chicken on the left, turn right.
    Take Venice and follow it all the way down. Then you’re in Marina del Rey.

    Stewart: Karina? How do you
    know so much about Marina del Rey?

    (With suspenseful music, Karina
    makes surprised face, then Stewart makes a confused face, then Gary makes a
    surprised face whilst looking in the mirror. Then, Karina and Stewart come to
    the mirror too, and start fixing their hair, trying to get into the mirrors
    view, look surprised, etc.)

    Intermission sort of thing

    Theme music: Ventura Road by
    America

    Voice: The
    Californians

    Aubrey:
    Karina, these nachos are incredible. What’s your secret?

    Karina: I use real
    California avocados.

    Stewart: Hey everyone.
    I’d like to make a toast. Thank you Aubrey for bringing this wonderful
    California wine all the way from Santa Barbara County, California.

    Trey: Well aren’t you
    going to toast to me?

    Stewart: Trey?

    Karina: Trey?

    Aubrey: Trey?

    Greg: Trey?

    Devin: Trey

    Maid: Mr. Trey?

    Trey: Yeah it’s me.

    Stewart: ewwwwhat are
    you doing here? You’re supposed to be in the Chino Correctional Center in
    Southern California.

    Trey: Well I escaped
    heh heh. I ran down an on ramp and hauled ass across the five, and then I
    hitched a ride on the back of a taco truck down to where the like 101 like
    meets the 10 you know? And I told the driver “Hey! Hang a right on Alhambra and
    drop me off on Sunset!” ha-ha.

    Karina: By Cahuenga?
    That’s right by his bungalow

    Greg: Hey! How do you
    know where he lives?

    (With suspenseful music,
    everyone makes a surprised face, then look in the mirror. Then, they start
    fixing their hair; trying to get into the mirrors view, look surprised, etc.)

    Theme music: Ventura Road by
    America

    Voice: The
    Californians. Right now on Soap Net.

  • unknown

    Here’s the script for those who need it.

    The Californians

    Actors:
    Karina (wife who’s cheating)
    Devin (worker)
    Stewart (husband)
    Greg (Doctor)
    Trey (random guy)
    Aubrey (friend)
    (All with super exaggerated
    Californian accents)
    Maid (Spanish accent)

    Script:
    Theme music: Ventura Road by
    America

    Voice: The
    Californians

    Karina: (On chair
    drinking wine) I’m glad you came over Devin.

    Devin: (Walking over
    with wine glass) I am too.

    Karina: (Stands up)
    Maybe you should get going before Stewart gets home.

    Devin: You’re probably
    right. I was gonna take Canyon View drive over to San Vicente, and then make a
    left and get on the 405 north, from there, just get off on Mulholland.

    Karina: I totally like
    that (Kisses Devin)

    Stewart: (walks in
    with hands full of tangerines) hey honey, I brought us some tangerines. This
    guy was selling them on the off ramp over by the 2. (Lowers hands and looks at
    Devin) Devin?

    Devin: (Makes
    surprised/ scared look)

    Karina: (Makes shocked
    look and looks over at Devin)

    Stewart: ewwwwhat are
    you doing here?

    Karina: Stewart. Why
    are you home so early?

    Stewart: I skipped
    Wilshire and took Beverly over to Santa Monica and took that all the way up.

    Devin: uh hey Stewart.
    Yeah, I just came over to f-fix the speakers, the outside speakers on the
    patio. I think they sound pretty good. How was work?

    Stewart: I think you
    should go home now, Devin.

    Karina: (Yelling)
    There’s nothing going on Stewart!

    Stewart: I said go
    home! Get back on San Vicente, take it to the 10, then switch over to the 405
    north and let it dump you out onto Mulholland where you belong!

    Karina: Stewart! At
    this time of day? It’s going to be jammed, are you crazy?

    Stewart: Just get on
    the 10 and get outta here!

    (All move over to mirror and
    start fixing their hair, trying to get into the mirrors view, look surprised,
    etc.)

    Intermission sort of thing

    Theme music: Ventura Road by
    America

    Voice: The
    Californians

    Karina: Thanks for
    helping me put away these sun dried tomatoes in this clay bowl

    Stewart: Great. Imma
    go get in the Jacuzzi.

    Maid: Mister Stewart a
    doctor is here to see you!

    Stewart: Doctor?
    (Walks over to doctor at door) Greg, what are you doing here? You don’t make house calls.

    Greg: oh well, I was
    in the area and thought I’d drop by to talk to you about your test results. I
    tried to go through on Westwood, but my GPS put me on Beverly-Glen and I didn’t
    want to end up in Enceno. Anyway, I think you should sit down, Stewart.

    Stewart: All right.
    Let’s sit down on these Mexican Country style chairs

    Greg: Yeah, totally.
    (Both move over to chairs and sit)

    Stewart: (Hands Greg a
    glass of wine)

    Greg: oh thanks. So,
    umm, uh. Oh! (remembers) uh You have cancer dude.

    Stewart: (surprised
    face) Are you serious?

    Greg: Yeah man, but
    don’t even worry, cuz there’s a good treatment center in Marina Del Ray.
    There’s lots of street parking and if not, there’s like a Coffee Bean across
    the street that fully validates. I live right by there, that’s how I know.

    Stewart: All the way
    on the other side of the 10?! That’s almost long beach, man

    Karina: Stewart, look
    at me. You can do this. I know a shortcut through El Segundo. Take the 105 West
    and exit on Culver. When you say the Zankou chicken on the left, turn right.
    Take Venice and follow it all the way down. Then you’re in Marina del Rey.

    Stewart: Karina? How do you
    know so much about Marina del Rey?

    (With suspenseful music, Karina
    makes surprised face, then Stewart makes a confused face, then Gary makes a
    surprised face whilst looking in the mirror. Then, Karina and Stewart come to
    the mirror too, and start fixing their hair, trying to get into the mirrors
    view, look surprised, etc.)

    Intermission sort of thing

    Theme music: Ventura Road by
    America

    Voice: The
    Californians

    Aubrey:
    Karina, these nachos are incredible. What’s your secret?

    Karina: I use real
    California avocados.

    Stewart: Hey everyone.
    I’d like to make a toast. Thank you Aubrey for bringing this wonderful
    California wine all the way from Santa Barbara County, California.

    Trey: Well aren’t you
    going to toast to me?

    Stewart: Trey?

    Karina: Trey?

    Aubrey: Trey?

    Greg: Trey?

    Devin: Trey

    Maid: Mr. Trey?

    Trey: Yeah it’s me.

    Stewart: ewwwwhat are
    you doing here? You’re supposed to be in the Chino Correctional Center in
    Southern California.

    Trey: Well I escaped
    heh heh. I ran down an on ramp and hauled ass across the five, and then I
    hitched a ride on the back of a taco truck down to where the like 101 like
    meets the 10 you know? And I told the driver “Hey! Hang a right on Alhambra and
    drop me off on Sunset!” ha-ha.

    Karina: By Cahuenga?
    That’s right by his bungalow

    Greg: Hey! How do you
    know where he lives?

    (With suspenseful music,
    everyone makes a surprised face, then look in the mirror. Then, they start
    fixing their hair; trying to get into the mirrors view, look surprised, etc.)

    Theme music: Ventura Road by
    America

    Voice: The
    Californians. Right now on Soap Net.

    • unknown

      ps this is for lexi sarah and kirsten for drama.

  • Kathleen Coats

    This is a SOUTHERN CA thing, not a Northern CA thing

  • Kathleen Coats

    This is a SOUTHERN CA thing, not a Northern CA thing